Destination New Normal
The new normal happened long ago with the smoking habit I once had. It keeps me going, knowing there is a indifferent someday. But today was a struggle, yet some how I found it in me.
I talked with my mom today regarding my feelings on the subject of not drinking. She too is abstaining, although her motivation is directly related to her celiac condition. Her desire to join in on the fun when family and friends are celebrating is much the same as my own. I don’t think she was ever as much of a drinker as I, but her father my gramdpa Scholpp, was a daily drinker.
Much like me I don't think he considered himself an alcoholic, maybe a regular drinker. Of course this is not for me to say what his thoughts on this were. He is long gone. And his behavior is only what I remember from my youth.
The thing is it gives me real pause to think if I am not a drunk, then why is it such a pain to go with out. I know why I am doing this exercise. I don’t like the effects the booze has on my evening life, and my sleep patterns. I want to be rid of the small daily annoyance drinking brings, and still be available to join the fun with friends and family. However, this booze vacation is not my first. I know all to well that any plans to keep things dialed back never seem to work.
Maybe it has to do with my wife’s consumption habit. It is like having a smoker in the room with you when you are trying to quit. I can only hope my efforts do not harm our relations, the way quitting smoking harmed a few of my friendships so many years ago.
I talked with my mom today regarding my feelings on the subject of not drinking. She too is abstaining, although her motivation is directly related to her celiac condition. Her desire to join in on the fun when family and friends are celebrating is much the same as my own. I don’t think she was ever as much of a drinker as I, but her father my gramdpa Scholpp, was a daily drinker.
Much like me I don't think he considered himself an alcoholic, maybe a regular drinker. Of course this is not for me to say what his thoughts on this were. He is long gone. And his behavior is only what I remember from my youth.
The thing is it gives me real pause to think if I am not a drunk, then why is it such a pain to go with out. I know why I am doing this exercise. I don’t like the effects the booze has on my evening life, and my sleep patterns. I want to be rid of the small daily annoyance drinking brings, and still be available to join the fun with friends and family. However, this booze vacation is not my first. I know all to well that any plans to keep things dialed back never seem to work.
Maybe it has to do with my wife’s consumption habit. It is like having a smoker in the room with you when you are trying to quit. I can only hope my efforts do not harm our relations, the way quitting smoking harmed a few of my friendships so many years ago.
Photo credit: Scott Cain
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